Sunday, February 28, 2010

Canada The Best in Hockey and Healthcare

The Winter Olympics came to a close and lots of records were broken in the Vancouver Games.  Team USA set a record for total medals, thank God for the X-Games events and the host Country Team Canada set the record for Golds.  Plus the Canadians showed that they still own hockey winning gold in  both the Mens and Womans. 

I'm sure Canada is breathing a sigh of relief especially those who work with or live near Ugly Americans.  No one does a victory lap like Americans do and couple that with the way those "woman" in Canada acted after beating Team USA, I would have been prank calling Canadians all night long. So you better be thankful for Sidney Crosby right about now.  

Canada feels about hockey the way the United States feels about basketball, although, Mr. James Naismith was actually Canadian (only Steve Nash apparently knew this).  We freakin own basketball and when we didn't, it pissed us off real bad.  So I understand how the Canadians must have felt when they lost last week to Team USA.  Give the American team their due they played with tons of heart and goaltender Ryan Miller was "standing on his head" (hockey lingo) until the Crosby goal. 

Bigger issue for me and others who like the Washington Capitals is Sidney Crosby continues to f-everything up for us. In the last year he and the Penguins eliminated the Caps on their way to a Stanley Cup and now he scores the decisive goal in the Gold Medal Game of the Olympics.  Did I mention he's only 22 years old?  He's in the Eastern Conference and he is on the franchise that owns (Penguins) the Caps in the Post Season.  He is an absolute pain in the ass!  

For many here in the States hockey is over until the next Olympics four years from now.  The fans that will stick around will likely see one of the more unpredictable finishes thanks to the two week break and a schedule that continues to cram games together. The NHL apparently trying to Capitalize on the Olympics decided why wait to get back at it and will play a game Monday night, Detroit @ Colorado.  Coach Mike Babcock you just won Olympic Gold what are you going to do?  Sorry Coach no time for Disney World your Red Wings play the Avalanche on the road.

Tomorrow, We tackle why the NFL Combine should be on the LOGO Channel. 

Friday, February 26, 2010

Best Olympic Event: Cat Fight

So it turns out the United States Woman's Ski Team is not much of a team afterall according to Julia Mancuso.  She feels too much attention is being given to Lindsey Vonn.  I guess no one ever told her blondes have more fun. 

Certainly this should be no shock; Vonn was a Sports Illustrated Cover Girl twice and in the swimsuit issue.  She is getting tons of attention and  is by far the best all around skier on the Team USA.  Also, let me point out a little something about skiing.  It is an individual sport for goodness sakes.  Just like golf and tennis, although sometimes there are team events.  Also, keep in mind and no offense (but here it comes) to the country club crowd, skiers are usually rich kids. 

Translation, not as mentally tough as athletes that play real team sports.  Golfers need shrinks as do tennis players and apparently so do skiers, especially Mancusco.  Golfers and tennis players need silence when they play.  Tiger Woods greatest player or is it playa in World has a heart attack every time a camera shutter clicks.  He allegedly grew up on Military golf courses, which usually have more noise than Grand Central Station.  You see the country club scene softens even those that were not born into it. 

Plus let me point out the obvious, these are woman!  Of course there will be petty jealousy!  My god that is in their nature.  Plus let's not forget when the Olympics are over the real gold rush begins for endorsement $$$.  So Mancuso is marketing herself as the underdog.  Although I find it funny this is the same girl complaining about Vonn getting special treatment and she's the one that wears a tiara?  So who's the diva Julia? 

There is also a saying in the world of public relations, all publicity is good publicity.  I think that is the case here and notice NBC has not shied away from talking this thing up on their coverage.  This is also a great opportunity for the Olympics to add a new event, Cat Fights, which they can just call woman's wrestling.  I think a Vonn/Mancuso matchup would break some serious pay per view $$ if Vince McMahon's WWE is inclined to make a pitch.  For the record I would take Vonn and her 160lbs. over the tiara wearing Mancuso, but I'm partial to blondes.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Baseball, Steroids, and Major League Shrinkage


"I'm not here to talk about the past".....but your brother is Big Mac.  Fomer Big League Slugger Mark McGwire's brother Jay McGwire is selling his brother's steroid use story in a book about to released. Talk about Bash Brothers!  Big Mac can not be happy as he tries to become comfortable in his new role as Cardinals hitting coach. 
"http://www.amazon.com/s?ie=UTF8&rh=i%3Astripbooks%2Cp_27%3AJay%20Mcgwire&field-author=Jay%20Mcgwire&page=1 
Great Family as you might have guessed from the strange family portrait, Mark's brother was a male body builder.  What a tool!  He claims he got Big Mac hooked to get him healthy, HGH and all kinds of steroids. 

However, I'm a little confused I thought Jose Canseco was the only "guy" to inject Big Mac in the buttocks. Now his brother wants part of that fame. At least he kept it in the family.  Too bad his father was not involved like Andy Pettite's old man.  I mean some dad's like to be buddies with their sons, but Pettite's dad took it a little to far, "son daddy got you some HGH!" As you might guess Big Mac and his brother Jay are estranged and in the book he essentially says the slugger took everything outside of a fish parazlyer (which would be fine in the all drug Olympics). 

Jay McGwire seems like a guy desperate for attention. I mean he was a male body builder for goodness sakes, what a tool!  By the way what do you think the longterm steroid use did to his testicles?  Not a pretty picture.  You want to scare teenage boys away from steroids use and HGH?  Tell them about the MAJOR league shrinkage these players suffer.  That will keep them off the juice!  Sorry ladies, but they don't call them the family jewels for nothing.  Yes, guys like to think they are priceless. 

Back to Big Mac, many are outraged that he will be the St. Louis Cardinals hitting coach. Count me in!  There is no place in baseball for a guy like him. Oh, I'm not talking about the cheating with the steroids.  I mean everyone was doing it.  What bothers me is Big Mac was not that good of a hitter.  He was only a .263 career hitter, had more strikeouts than walks, and just slightly more hits than strikeouts.  Plus according to his brother the juice is what improved his bat speed later in his career.  What positives can this guy bring to the locker room you might ask?  Well, he could always scare the guys straight by showing off his shrinkage. 

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

The Winter Olympics Stealing Circus Talent

The more I watch the Winter Olympics the more it reminds me of something I would see at the Circus, but without those annoying fing clowns.  Does anyone honestly like clowns? 

Anyway, the Winter Olympics are full of acrobats these days.  I know they are trying to appeal to a younger audience and it also helps NBC get their billions worth by keeping the American audience interested. I'm not complaining we are good at these X Games Sports and are on pace for a record setting medal count thanks to them. 

I just wonder what the net effect is on the good folks at Ringling Brothers.  I mean the PETA folks already want to take the animals out of the circus.  Anyone, who has been to the circus lately knows the daredevils have become the show and the fing clowns.  So if the daredevils start chasing Olympic Gold like that Shaun White kid, who actually looks like a daredevil clown, then what?  

Notes:  Also, who came up with The Nordic Combined?  A combo of ski jumping and a cross country skiing relay.  Really?  What a stupid combo, I mean anyone cool enough to Ski Jump would never waste their time with something as boring as cross country skiing let alone a relay.

Monday, February 22, 2010

Do You Believe In Miracles!

Today is the 30th Anniversary of the greatest sporting event in American history, the 1980 USA Hockey Team beating the Soviet Union 4-3 in the Lake Placid Winter Olympics.  I remember it like it was yesterday.  There are many reasons why it is so memorable, a bunch of College Kids beating the best pros in the world.  It was the height of the Cold War.  It was a sport no one really paid much attention too outside of the Major NHL cities and Canadians, which come to think of it is just like today. 

ABC thought so little of the game they showed it tape delayed and for the kids reading, no there were no extra cable channels, hell there was no cable or dish for that matter. (Yes it was the dark ages.  We even had to get up to turn the channel! No this was not the great depression.)  There were lots of tape delayed events back in those days, which come to think of it 30 years later is similar to what NBC is doing now!

I mean Bode Miller was not shown live during the day yesterday,         instead Russia and the Czech Republic hockey was on NBC, which I did not mind. Yet the United States and Canada were kicked MSNBC and plenty of tape delayed action was shown on NBC in Prime Time including Miller's gold and of course Live Ice Dancing. What the hell were those Russians wearing! They made Johnny Weir (rhymes with Queer) seem conservative.  Maybe the Native Americans can hate on the Ice Dancers instead of the Redskins for a little while.

Back to why Team USA's win was so memorable especially for those of us growing up in Washington DC. There was a news anchor on the local ABC Channel 7 named Renee Poussaint.  Anyway, as I said the game was shown tape delayed, so between peroids (game tied 3-3 after 2) they had local news teases and Renee blurts out something like U-S-A beats Soviets at 11pm!  

The producer let her have it and she was very embarrassed.  Sports guy, Tim Brandt (style), helped Renee by saying it was still very exciting to watch even knowing the result.  She felt horrible and really never lived the moment down.  No one could ever bring her name up without telling that story, but everyone in DC  remembers Renee when they remember "Miracle On Ice."  Hell she's a legend for it, kind of  like the Mike Eruzione of local news anchors making a career off of one moment. 

Sunday, February 21, 2010

A Visit to the Mecca

Saturday night I set out for a truly religious experience.  I went to a NY Knicks game at Madison Square Garden.  I mean this is the building  Elvis, Led Zeppelin, MJ, Gretzky, Kobe, Lebron, U2, and Numerous United States Presidents have performed in.  Oh and the Knicks call it home too. If the Category is Greats, which one of these does not fit?  If you answered Knicks you are right.  It is great to have celebreties courtside (Justin Tuck of the Giants was the celeb last night..Weak!), but not so great when they are a bigger story than the team.  Also, you ever notice some of the greatest moments always involve opposing players lighting up the Knicks? 

Ok enough of the cheap shots. I went to what many ballers (I'm so white) refer to as the Mecca. I have been to my fair share of different arenas during my seven years covering the NBA, but never MSG.  How is that possible?  Simple.. I only traveled during the Playoffs, understand now?  I mean the Knicks have been a punch line for the last decade.  The talk surrounding the franchise is rarely the play on the court, but instead what Superstar can we get to play here in the off-season.   


Monday Night they will celebrate the 40th Anniversary of their 1969-70 NBA Championship team.  Three years later they won another in the 1972-73 season.  You know how many Knicks Titles have been raised since? 0...zip, nada, none!  You know how many franchises have won titles since the Knicks last?  12 some multiple times like the Celtics, Lakers, Bulls, Pistons, Spurs, Rockets, and others one title like Golden State Warriors, Portland Trail Blazers, Washington Bullets, Seattle Super Sonics, Philadelphia 76ers, and Miami Heat.  For my DC friends we laugh at how long ago '78, yet it was 5 years more recent than the Mighty Knicks!  Yet there is not the man power wasted on what might be with those franchises because they don't have the historic building and #1 media market hyping them. 

I will admit if it boiled down to which building and fan base cares more the Knicks would be the Lakers or Celtics or the Yankees to put in New York terms.  The Hype around the Knicks is so enormous and it overshadows the mediocre results.  The last time I checked pro sports are about results right?  It is really ridiculous to think about all coverage wasted on such a mediocre product.  It got me to thinking, what if this happened in politics?  You know someone with style an no substance getting way too much airtime.  You know someone who is not even in the game?  Imagine what a joke that would be!

Friday, February 19, 2010

Buddhism The Cure for Bootie Calls

Before I get to Tiger Woods "robotic apology", the press coverage has officially "Jumped the Shark."  I will not say which one, but a certain National News Network (who's building I have been working in this week), used the the first 10 minutes to cover it from every possible  angle.  At one point some stupid Junior College Woman's Golf team was be interviewed and one of the players actually started crying about Tiger cheating on his wife.  Get your own freakin life girl! 

Ok to the "press conference" or actually poorly read statement because there were no questions allowed, which got me to thinking.  What would I ask Tiger if I could?  I would simply ask Tiger this...Outside of the "Hostess" from NYC, WTF were you thinking? (I mean a waffle house waitress who lives in a trailer park, Two washed up porn stars,  two failed models, and several bimbos looking for their 15 minutes and guess what they are getting it now).  I think Tiger should sue TLC Laser Eye Center because clearly the surgery did not work. There is no way in hell he has 20/20 vision.  I mean look at your wife man!


Anyway, my favorite moment of the press conference was when Tiger explained how if he had kept practicing Buddhism it might have kept from chasing Bootie! The theory may hold water though, really, I mean the Dalai Lama has never been involed in a sex scandal.  So now that he's back to buddhism does this mean Elin needs to worry about Tiger buying gerbels like Richard Gere?  Ok, that may have been too much of a visual , for that I am sorry. 

So Tiger is headed back to therapy for his "sex addiction" in Mississippi. For those of you that do not know my position on "sex addiction" I will sum it up simple as possible. It is complete BULLSHIT! The only bigger b-s is the body language experts, which are everywhere on this Tiger apology.  I really think the "disease" was created for the rich and famous as an excuse to basically do whatever the hell they want until they get caught. It is amazing John Edwards has not figured this out yet.

Notes:  Happy to report a full week in NYC and I have not seen a single rat (outside of Bernie Kerik on tv). Also, for those of you wanting to let me know that the snowboarders jeans are snow pants, please read the top of the blog banner.  On this blog we go for entertaining before accuracy.  This is not the NY Times, we don't break news, we make fun of it or if necessary make it up. 

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Super Bowl of Rednecks

Great news for all the diehard NASCAR Fans out there.  Last week's Super Bowl of Racing the Daytona 500 proved once and for all that Corporate America has not taken away the sports roots rednecks. No, no, the fact that a pothole on the Super Bowl surface held the race hostage for several hours proves NASCAR is still a real redneck operation.  Ok, wait to be fair, do you know how many times the Super Bowl has been delayed because of issues with the field?   ZERO!  The NFL should sue NASCAR for trying to compare the two events. 

The other thing that kills me about this story is why do you need to fix the pothole?  I mean these guys are supposed to be the greatest drivers in the world, right?  I have spent the past week in the back of New York City Cabs and these guys seem to drive just fine with endless amounts of potholes and a hell of a lot more traffic!  I know the argument NASCAR drivers are racing at almost 200 mph...and guess what so are the New York City Cab drivers!  Some how, some way these guys avoid not only the endless amounts of potholes, but also the pedestrians that have no regard for the cross walk signs. 

Clearly I'm not a big NASCAR fan, but here is some advice for Hendrick Motor Sports dump Dale Jr. now and sign up Khalid Sheikh Mohammed (ok maybe that is not his name) the Cab driver who got me from the Port Authority to West 57th in under 5 minutes during rush hour while it was snowing on Tuesday.  This guy has mad skills! 

Notes:  Today while on a break (little boys room) on my really important assignment I had another brush with fame.  While I was letting it hang out so to speak at the urinal who walks in? A pretty famous musician from a really cool Late Night show. I wish I could tell you his name, but it would blow my cover. 

Can't wait to hear Tiger's bullshit tomorrow!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

I'm Alive and Watching the Winter Olympics

Ok, first let me say that I am sorry for the lack of posts lately, but I am on assignment and actually doing real work.  I can not reveal much, but let's just say that a former "Perky" Today Show Host and I are working in the same building.  That's right the bigtime...although in two weeks I will be kicked out of the building and she will continue to handle the nightly news. 

Anyway, how bout the Winter Olympics?  The more I watch curling the more confused I am.  I can't decide whether it is more like bocce or shuffle board on ice?  Apparently it works in Canada just like public healthcare, which means it is doomed to fail in this country. 

However, I love the Extreme Sports addition to the Winter Games.  You know Snowboard Cross and the half pipe basically X Games Stuff that will help Team USA pad the medal count every year.  I just worry about these burnouts athletes passing their drug tests. 

Another issue I have with it is some of these snowboarders are wearing jeans during their competition, which begs the question is it really a sport?  I mean if you can drink, smoke, or wear jeans and compete it is not a sport.  Apologies to bowling, golf, darts, rodeo, pool, and Major League Baseball. 
I have actually attempted to snowboard on a few occasions and I realize it is not easy on the lower body you have to be strong and have balance (I have neither).  I respect these snowboarders, but if you want the over 30 crowd to take you seriously put on some snow pants over the jeans.  

NOTES:  Late breaking news...Another member of the Wizards big three is gone, Antawn Jamison is headed to Cleveland and a real chance at an NBA title.  Great Guy on and off the floor, good luck Antawn.  As for the Wizards or what is left, GILBERT ARENAS!  That's right that is what's left, Gilbert.  You know the quirky oft injured all-star, who started the bring all your guns to work day in DC. Sure the Wizards cleared lots and lots of cap space, but that does not mean all-star free agents will line up to sign up to play in DC.  The dump was the easy part.  The Hard part is finding the next core group, good luck Ernie. 

Friday Tiger Talks but doesn't take any questions seems like he learned a lot in rehab.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

NC State Still The Nail

A year ago at this time the Tar Heels were well on their way to a National Championship....fast forward a year...oh, how the mighty have fallen.  However, as much as things change, some remain the same as evident in Saturday's whipping of (rival?) NC State. 

The Wolf Pack as much as it pains their fan base are still the nail to the Tar Heels hammer.  No, Ed Davis, Tyler Zeller, and even down a Wear Twin, no problem it's NC State/Carolina it is the Tar Heels birth right to win. The Heels have been horrible of late, but something about the NC State Red and Cool Aid Coat on Sidney Lowe=Win.  It must suck to be a State fan because they HATE the Tar Heels more than they love them selves.  (How many days until football season?)

UNC is likely NIT bound still, which won't sit well with a fan base that expects ACC titles and Final 4s.  However if nothing else this season they can be prideful of the fact they are the Cool Aide Killers. 

Notes:  Maryland crapped the bed Saturday in their chance to pass Duke in the ACC.  A Fantastic week for the Blue Devils beating UNC and Maryland.  However, why do I feel Duke would only be 5th in the Big East?  Very ordinary year for College Basketballs Most decorated conference. 


Friday, February 12, 2010

Caps Coach It Keeping Real


There is a lot to like about Capitals Coach Bruce Boudreau, winner, makes great commercials, and does not have a post game filter.  Here was his thoughts on his teams defesive efforts and goaltending after a 6-5 loss to the Ottawa Senators,  "It was an ugly display," a furious Boudreau said. "I thought our defense was horrible and our goaltending was horrible. You're not going to win when you give up six goals and maybe five of them are bad ones and our 'D' can't make a play. It's awful."


So Coach what did you Really think of Goalie Semyon Varlamov's return to the ice?

"I don't think he was ready to play," Boudreau said. "He knew he was going to play. He's had 12 days of practice and a game [in the minor leagues] under his belt. It's his responsibility to be ready."


And there is more...."When you say, he's rusty, it's an excuse," he added. "And excuses aren't tolerated. The puck's going through his legs? He's been making that save since he was seven years old."

Wow..no need to panic obviously 14-straight W's and a pair of losses is a good trade off for any team, but the manner of the two losses has raised some red flags on the Red's biggest concern going into the season..Defense/Goaltending.  They have surrendered 23 goals in the past five games after allowing 7 in the five games before that.  Defense, Goaltending, and health are the three biggest factors for the Caps hopes of raising Lord Stanley's Cup.   The first two may have to be addressed before the trading deadline and the latter they have no control over.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

ACC Basketball Meet ACC Football

The best rivalry in College Basketball hardly was an instant classic on Wednesday night when Duke pulled away to beat the sputtering defending National Champion UNC Tar Heels.  Shooting a sorry 34% and once again proving if you take them out of Cameron they are very vunerable.

A win is a win and no one should apologize for it, but let's be honest if Duke is truly the elite team in the ACC that was not an inspiring performance.  The conference certainly is suffering from what football suffers from year in and year out...No title contender and no real horrible teams (Miami knocking off Ga.Tech).  Although NC State made a strong case for horrible against Va. Tech.  However, in some ways it is more entertaining because night in and night out it is anyones game.  Just remember not to fill your brackets out with a bunch of ACC teams in the Elite 8.

Duke (already at 20 wins) will have a fantastic looking record  when the season is over, but scratch beneath the surface and you will see a team that looks very similar to the last several years.  They need the right draw to make through the first weekend of the NCAA tournament. 

As for the Heels it has been quite a down year fresh of the National Championship.  First it can't be stated enough this is not that Championship team (NO Hansbrough, Lawson, Ellington, and Green).  Too many injuries, no leadership, too much youth, poor shooters, poor defensive effort, and too many turnovers, to name just a few. 

An ugly win over Duke could have been what the doctor ordered, but instead they will have to get well against NC State this weekend.  The Wolf Pack not too long ago whipped Duke and looked like a team that could make some noise.  Instead they have settled into the ACC basement and for all the hoopla about next year b/c of the recruiting class coming in...just remember THIS YEARS TAR HEELS.  

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Break Up Wizards..Bring Back Terpzards

The Washington Wizards season is thankfully at the All-Star Break, but unfortunately they do have to play the final 32 games of the season.  They sit at 17-33, which sadly is just 7-games back from the final Playoff spot in the sorry Eastern Conference. 


By now you know the story of the fall of franchise player/practical joker/soon to be felon Gilbert Arenas. A sad tale of stupidity/immaturity at the highest level.  Certainly Gilbert is not Charles Manson more like Peter Pan with a lot of guns, but his immaturity and lack of leadership has cost the franchise dearly.  Now its time for the front office (Ernie Grunfeld) to clean up the mess that he had a hand in creating.

The NBA's trading deadline is just 9 days away and it would be almost criminal if the Wizards stood pat and played the patience card once again.  Look in the stands there are a more empty seats than a Washington Nationals game. So they better do something to fire up the fan base.  Most likely to move seems to be Caron Butler and if someone will take Soulja Boy (DeShawn Stevenson) it would be worth it.  There are so many trade rumors it's not even worth listing them, but there is one that might really fire up a portion of the fan base that has left the building. 

One hint...TERP-ZARDS...that's right a deal with Portland that would bring back the pasty point guard, Steve Blake!  Then the Wizards could bring Juan Dixon back to the States, he is currently playing for Unicaja Málaga in Spain.  Plus they could get Lonny Baxter at a discount since he's not playing anywhere right now.  Plus who better than Baxter to explain DC gun laws to the team?

You may remember Baxter was arrested only a few blocks from the White House after firing a .40 caliber Glock handgun into the air. He was later sentenced to 60 days in prison after pleading guilty to possession of an unregistered firearm and unregistered ammunition charges.

The other option is to just see if you could make a deal to get the current group from College Park to play out the season.  Their season is certainly worth watching, while the Wizards are essentially on a trade watch and the games are just a side note.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Sex Addicts or BS Artists?

Former Mets GM and ESPN Baseball Analyst Steve Phillips did his public mea culpa on NBC's Today Show and played what is becoming the first card in the deck of public salvation these days, SEX ADDICT.  http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=4896683  
He was in the same treatment center in Mississippi that Tiger Woods has made famous. Before I spit in the face of these therapist that diagnose this disease, let me say this. Who really gives a crap about Steve "Freakin" Phillips?  I mean he did those obnoxious fake press conferences on ESPN and had no shot of ever running a baseball team again before this. So what's the upside for him?  Doing MLB TV?  (plus could you have picked a better looking woman to cheat with?)

Ok back to the big point here. For those of you that do not know my position on this let me make it real clear, I think most of these famous "sex addicts" are full of shit!  Ok I said it, I think they are liars that are only remorseful because they got publicly humilated usually by their wife or some crazy ex.  I'm not saying sex addiction does not exist however, it would not be more believable if it was not always some Hollywood actor, athlete, or politician that claims it after being busted?
Are they really sick or just sick?  For entertainment purposes only I will put money down on John Edwards  playing the card publicly before 2011.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

New Orleans and Baltimore Celebrate!

Shame on us, that's right all of us.  You know who you are (me), I am rooting for New Orleans, but Peyton is just too smart and the Colts will win.  Super Bowl 44 is another example of why I do not bother with Reality TV, you know Dancing with the Stars and American Idol.  Sports are still the best form of Reality TV.  As Jim Mora once said, "You think you know but you don't!"  Plus the toughest part of watching shows like Dancing with the Stars and American Idol is telling your parents you are GAY. 

Where do you think they are partying harder, Bourbon Street or the Inner Harbor?  Anyway, way to go former great Redskins Gregg Williams, Mark Brunell, Chase Daniel, Leigh Torrence, and Pierson Prioleau!  Be thankful the Redskins let you leave.  Great weekend for former Skins, congrats to Russ Grimm about damn time a Hog got into the Hall of Fame.  The most famous offensive line ever and only one representative.  Apologies to the Buffalo Bills Electric Company, but the Hogs made bigger better and they weren't blocking for a double murderer (OJ).  OK Timmy Smith did time for drugs, but he never cut his ex-wife's head off.    Hopefully this will open the door for Joe Jacoby and the head Hog Joe Bugel. 

Notes:  Congrats to the Caps for rallying to beat the Penguins.  I had an unfortunate Twitter incident in the second period of that game.  Let's call it premature Twitter, which is common at my age.  Anyway, I stated the Caps were still Pittsburgh's ....., whoops!  Not the case however I still need to remind the world that the NHL Post season is so much different than the regular season.  So enjoy it...but remember its still sports, that's why they play the games.  

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Johnson Getting Help For His

A former Dallas Cowboys coach endorsing a male enhancement drug!  Wow, you can't make up copy this good. I always thought of Jerry Jones as the franchise's little prick.   No apparently former two-time Super Bowl Champion Coach Jimmy Johnson has that title now. 

In all seriousness (sort of) every man has their issues and I guess instead of making fun of the JJ we should give him credit for being man enough (thanks to extenze) to admit it. 

http://profootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2010/02/05/in-an-effort-to-go-mainstream-extenze-hires-jimmy-johnson/

Friday, February 5, 2010

Judge Tells Perv Turn Over Edwards Porno

The viewing parties will have to come to an end for Andrew Young and his wife.  Friday a judge order they turn over the sex tape that allegedly has John Edwards and his former mistress Rielle Hunter in it.  The tape allegedly was shot while Hunter was pregnant with the "love child." 

Ever since the story broke I have wondered what is this pervert Young doing with this video. Turn it over already.  It is just gross.  Then I remembered a Jerry Springer episode I saw several years ago or wait was it Maury or Geraldo?  Never mind the point is the episode was about guys that were turned on by porno movies involving pregnant woman.  Now I can't confirm this, but there was a guest who was behind a curtain that looked a lot like this pervert Andrew Young. 

Anyway, I'm pretty sure it was Springer because a fight broke out when a pregnant lady in the audience got angry at the "perv" behind the curtain (probably Young).  Jerry and his security team had to break it up.  Anyone else see that episode?

Capitals Win 12th in a Row, DC Freezes Over

I remember my first pro sports experience as a youngster.  I was 4 or 5 years old and I went and saw the Washington Capitals play the LA Kings at Capital Centre.  My entire family went thanks to my aunt's connection with the Kings. There must have been at least 100 other people at the game.  It was the franchise's second year of existence; they won 11 games the entire season. 

They got better in the 80s making the playoffs 14-straight times. Unfortunately the playoffs would always end with epic heart break.  Remember the opening round of the playoffs in 1987? Caps up 3-1 in series on the NY Islanders, who rally to force a Game 7.  It was no ordinary Game 7, it would be known as the infamous Easter Epic that finally ended at 1:56 am on Easter Sunday. The Capitals despite dominating most of the game, outshooting the Islanders 75–52 lose in overtime when Pat LaFontaine scored for the Islanders.

I remember fans saying the day the Caps win a Stanley Cup, hell will freeze over.  We are not there quite yet, but DC is certainly freezing over again this weekend.  The Caps are a breath of fresh air in a pro sports town where we have seen a lot of losers and I'm not even talking about the Politicians.  I mean another overhyped Skins team did not deliver and the best Wizards roster in decades is well...AWFUL.  (A Positive side note on the snow coming.  It could very well keep the Wizards from getting back in time to lose again on the home floor Saturday night.) 

Unfortunately it is still a long, long, journey to the Stanley Cup Finals, let alone hoisting the Cup.  In two weeks the red hot Caps will take a break with the rest of the league for the Winter Olympics.  The Caps best players though will not be resting, but representing their respective countries.  How will it effect the season?  No one knows and there are still questions with the defense and goaltending that may need to be addressed by the trade deadline.  Oh and I have yet to mention the f-ing Penguins likely standing in the way like they have some many other times? 

That still won't stop me from expecting the best from this team.  They have the best player in the world sorry Sid in Alex Ovechkin, young stars like Nicholas Backstrom, Alex Semin, and veteran Mike Knuble has been a great fit, thanks Flyers.  Anyway, too many positives to worry about the possible pitfalls, so for now enjoy the ride and the snow in New Hockey Town USA.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Super Bowl Week is a Super Bore

Ok, first let me get this out of the way.  Yes I wish I was in Miami, Florida, eating and drinking on some station's dime.  No doubt, so there will be a tone of envy and jealousy in this blog.  Now that is out of the way.....one question for you.  Have we learned a damn thing about the Saints or Colts we already didn't know before this week of hype and non-stories?

Here's a sample of what has been covered so far on each side. 
Saints:                                                      
1. Great story b/c of Hurricane Katrina          
2. Peyton's dad played for them                     
3. Drew Brees Great QB and Great guy 
4. Reggie Bush likes Kim Kardashian's large ass
5. Owner Tom Benson has seen lots of losing   

Colts:
1. Great story b/c they f-d Baltimore
2. Peyton plays for them                                                                       
3. Peyton has a large brain under that helmet
4. Freeney's ankle is as large as Kim's ass
5. Peyton, Peyton, Hatian WR, Peyton
 
Bankers get a bad rap for their big bonuses and rightfully so, but we need an audit of money spent and worthwhile work achieved from Super Bowl week. I mean most of this crap could have been written while sitting on the hotel room toilet or from South Beach.  I know it sounds like I'm there. 

Two Great Nights of TV Thanks ABC

Thanks to the return of "Lost" and the best comedy on TV since Seinfeld, "Modern Family", ABC owns me Tuesday and Wednesday nights.  First, I have no clue how there are two sets of realities going on with the cast of "Lost."  I mean the explosion happens and the plane doesn't crash, yet there is this whole other thing happening on the island.  I still love the show although I feel lost when watching "Lost" most of the time.  They should run a disclaimer that says creators of this show are on mind altering drugs. 

"Modern Family" meanwhile just gets funnier each week, a Moon Landing!  Last night it saved me from overanalyzing the Hoyas meltdown against South Florida.  Where did all the Hoyas fans go?  I mean Saturday the place is packed with Duke in town.  I'm sure they will draw well with Villanova on Saturday unless it snows out.  Bottom line... the Hoya fan is like a lot of the others in DC, front runners.  Good news for the Hoyas though, everyone is average in College Hoops this season with perhaps the exception of Kansas and Kentucky, but raise your hand if you trust John Calipari in the big game?  Heck he blamed "God's Will" two years ago when he choked the title away against the Jayhawks.  So although many love the unpredictability of this years College Basketball, I love the predictabilty of TV's two best shows. 

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Hostage Crisis Reaches Day 3 in NC

It amazes me how soft this generation of kids is in this great country of ours and  it pisses me off too.  What used to be considered parenting or coaching is now considered child abuse.  Vince Lombardi would have never had a Championship trophy named after him if he coached in this decade.  He was way too tough and clearly would have been run off.  Could you imagine if that sissy kid of Craig James played for Frank Kush or Woody Hayes?  OMG..as the kids like to say. 

I know it is called progress.  WE know more today than we did back then.  Bottled water, bike helmets, car seats until your 16, mouth pieces for PE, No PE, and extra sunscreen. 

Anyway, here's my point....I never walked up a hill 2 miles to school with no shoes, but I sure as hell went to school with a little snow on the sidewalks every once and a while. Even my kids are now saying being home  is a bore and why can't we go to school.  However, the school district is just covering their backsides in this sue everyone society we live in.  Now the kids get ready for Saturday school this weekend and a shortened Spring Break and guess who pays the price for those goofy schedules?  That's right the parents.  Isn't progress great? 

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

What is Exclusive Anymore?

Remember when exclusive actually meant exclusive?  I have thought a lot about this word "exclusive" while watching coverage of the John Edwards scandal lately.  Not "exclusive" in the sense of Edwards and his wife, which apparently was not very exclusive.  No I mean from the media standpoint.  When a network says they have an exclusive, I figure that means they have the interview and no one else does. 

However, in this day and age of show business/news it is all about how you sell it to the public.  Yes and sadly that does mean "deceive" or bend the truth.  I say this b/c two tv stations here in Raleigh, NC, claimed to be the exclusive place to see former Edwards aide, Andrew "Judas" Young get interviewed.

First of all Young has talked to every media outlet at this point about his book, so big damn deal.  I mean "Cat Fancy" and "Horse and Hound" had him on the cover this week.  The guy gets around.  Secondly, clearly neither station one upped the other yet they wanted to b.s. their viewers just in case they were not paying attention. 

Late breaking news Andrew and Cheri Young need to turn over the Edwards sex tape.  No word on whether or not they will or is they will continue watching it together.  Either way I know one or two stations here will have an exclusive story on it even if "Cat Fancy" or "Horse and Hound" had it first.

http://abclocal.go.com/wtvd/story?section=news/local&id=7253229

Monday, February 1, 2010

Tebow Pro Choice But is He a Pro QB?

NFL teams could care less is Tim Tebow is pro life or pro choice.  What they do care about is whether or not he can actually play Quarterback in the NFL. If he threw the ball like Matt Ryan he could be the Devil himself and NFL GM's would draft him.  So far the evidence suggests he is no pro at least at Quarterback.  He makes Danny Wuerffel look like Dan Marino with his wobbly passes.  Everyone talks about his release point, but what about his velocity or lack there of?  Nothing he did or didn't do at the Senior Bowl should be shocking.   Struggled taking snaps from center, showed poor mechanics, and thanked God. 
On the College Gridiron Tebow could do it all and even circumsize babies in the off-season.  He was a model citizen, who one day may really lose it when he realizes all the fun and opportunity he missed in Gainesville.  He probably will never be a starting QB in the NFL.  Sure he could be a career backup, great locker room guy, leader, etc. Some sucker team like the Jaguars may even take him with an early pick to fire up their disinterested fan base or ego maniac Bill Belichick may take him just to prove a point.  And if all else fails he could always replace Pat Robertson on the 700 Club.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/02/01/AR2010020102067.html